Take Hat....

Posted by Jeni in Ad Infinitum | 30 November 2010

I cancelled my 11.0'clock appointment. Felt really queasy and coldy. Meditated. had a big mug of my Jewish Penicillin, then dressed.

One pair of 501 jeans - thick.

One pair of bikers boots and sox - thick.

One t-shirt. One cardigan. One sweater - thick.

One coat - not thick enough.

One purple shawl - thick.

One hat - too big but thick.

One pair of black suede gloves.

And I set off out in the arctic wastes of Sarf London.

The 170 bus came immediately, so I had to disrobe it was so HOT.

Out at Victoria and on with my brown bowler. Onto the tube and I joined all the other mad hatters. Everybody in London was dressed to kill with all their different titfers. Knitted hats, crocheted hats,flat caps and hunters. Hooded hats and helmets. Headgear that fitted, headgear that was too big, too furry, or just plain daft. Cowls, berets, tam-o'shanters, beany's, soft hats, hard hats, cloche hats and fedoras. When a big brown eyed girl sat down in front of me, a python length scarf wrapped round her neck and a big, white woolly jobby pulled over her head, the massive bobble on the top of head had a life of its own, I'm sorry but I actually laughed out loud.

I got out at Oxford Circus and decided to buy myself a woolly snood. The sales assistant was so disrespectful I left her punching the till and walked out.

Had a bright meeting with my agent then set off to THE TRAFALGAR STUDIOS to see Tracy Bennett play Judy Garland in 'Over The Rainbow.'

I hadn't read the papers so didn't know there was another student demo. Good for them. Trafalgar Square was flanked by LOTS of police in riot gear. Vans, horses, students, shields, batons, students. Noise, snow, tourists,students, confusion. I was let through the cordon because one of the coppers recognised me off the radio....

Met up with my consort, we had vegetables and chips in a splendid pub, opposite the theatre, served by a Polish doll, then took our seats in Row 'C'.

I slipped on my scarf and kicked the geezer sitting next to me with my big boots. But when the lights went down and The Bennett started her act it was riveting. I cried, laughed, hooted and dissolved. If she doesn't get an award for her tour-de-force performance, i'll eat my hat, and all the others that I saw on the Victoria Line....

Jeni Barnett tells of her scrumptious time at Good Food Live in her first audiobook! Download NOW from iTunes

Comments

1. At December 1, 2010 12:15 PM Kirsten wrote:

Happy December 1st to you Jeni, hope you're feeling better. I love seeing the array of hats people wear in the winter; such variety! I bought myself a titfer for the very first time a few weeks ago; a black, John Lennon- style cap. I love it, but it doesn't keep my ears warm. Yet again, I choose style over function. :)))

Thanks for telling us about 'Over the Rainbow, this is one that I'd missed. I'll try to get a ticket before it ends.

Snow is falling here in Kent, nonstop since last night. I'm doing a rather good impersonation of the Michelin Man, got my laptop on my knees in the hope the heat from it will also heat me - not working so far.

I'm hoping to spend Saturday in London; want to see the Diaghilev exhibition at the V&A & the Gauguin exhibition at Tate Modern. Now I'll just have to see what the weather does; don't fancy being stuck on a train for hours on end.

If you or anyone else is in London on Saturday, there's a craft fair in the town hall on the Kings Road in Chelsea, 11-4pm.

I've rambled on enough. Big love to you & yours Jeni, and to Rhianon, Ms Marmite & all the gang.

2. At December 1, 2010 1:56 PM Fiona wrote:

Hello Jeni. Still missing you in the afternoons while I drive around London :( I too had a silly hat on today, borrowed as an emergency from mother. Daughter was mortified at the school gates when I pointed out her's was on back to front. Her face was framed by a purple square making her look like an extra from The Grinch. Made me laugh out loud. x

3. At December 1, 2010 3:46 PM Beau Brummie Allegedly wrote:

Gosh. Hats who knew. If I were a hat I'd be a Fez hopefully - or something with exotica or character - imagine to learn that you are nowt but a bobble?

I think you would suit a polopancho ...
http://www.google.co.uk/imgres?imgurl=http://www.idealworld.tv/common/images/product//131440/standard/131440_STANDARD___20091109.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.idealworld.tv/Polopancho_131440.aspx%3Ffh_location%3D//idealworld/en_GB/categories%40lt;%257Bidealworld_1003%257D/price_iw%40lt;10.0/clothing_iw%40gt;%257Bfashion20accessories%257D%26showVideo%3D1&usg=__oFuL3ZnbudAoiDHHY-idrfeYYzs=&h=600&w=600&sz=130&hl=en&start=0&sig2=DnXBqiM2ifrNSisX5-P3dg&zoom=1&tbnid=72kyXZVNOhRzbM:&tbnh=138&tbnw=138&ei=eW32TLivIpG1hAfiy8m-BQ&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dpolopancho%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26sa%3DN%26biw%3D1240%26bih%3D574%26tbs%3Disch:1&um=1&itbs=1&iact=hc&vpx=138&vpy=72&dur=433&hovh=197&hovw=197&tx=99&ty=68&oei=eW32TLivIpG1hAfiy8m-BQ&esq=1&page=1&ndsp=19&ved=1t:429,r:0,s:0

4. At December 2, 2010 7:19 PM Marmite wrote:

Hey Jeni

I can't believe how cold it is, even my poor dog is shivering I did something I swore I wouldn't and bought her a furry coat!!!
Lovely to hear from Kirsten, glad you are getting out and about (weather permitting).

Now Jen when are we getting that exciting news you mentioned???
Much love
Marmite xx

5. At December 3, 2010 8:08 PM Rhianon wrote:

Hello, hope we're all surviving the snow.
You can't drink, Jeni? I'll teach you. Us Baptists make fine drinkers!
I recently made 2 litres of limoncello, (1 litre left......) and had a go at the orange version. They taste wonderful but look like samples. Like a passing, (yes, thats passing) beast piddled in the bottles. Put me off for about 30 seconds.
Stay warm and safe everyone, yeah?

6. At December 3, 2010 10:47 PM Sydney Conway wrote:

Hi Jenni,Why & when did you leave LBC without letting us know ?

7. At December 16, 2010 10:05 PM Morgan wrote:

Happy 2010 buddy. Just stopping by to tell you how much i enjoyed your blog.

8. At December 16, 2010 10:32 PM eleonor novi wrote:

i am not STILL in pain, i
WILL BE UNTIL JENI IS BACK

i asked james max, the business head, to help Jeni to start JENIBC, her own radio...
YOU CAN DO IT FROM ANYWHERE,JENI, FROM SUNNY COTE D'AZUR, eg...with modern days technology
JUST DO IT FOR US, WE ARE NOTHING WITHOUT YOU

DO NOT GIVE UP
THE EVIL OFTEN WIN, AS THEY HAVE NO MORALS, THEY DO NOT FEAR GOD, BUT THE TRUTH AND BEAUTY(=YOU) WILL WIN AT THE END

it was the worst crime ever, whoever raised their vile hand to sack Jeni Barnet deserves the worst punishment.

So underhandedly, not a single explanation...and we are told this country is democratic..when the best talents just disappear, without a word, only because they are not Tory supporters...

She is the world's, nation's treasure, London, UK are just not the same without her, it is like the sun stopped shining.

Genius is all about truth, they cannot help speaking up the truth..

Who can respect this country any more when everything talented is cornered and the mediocre put on pedestal..

Copyright 2007, Jeni Barnett. Website produced by Chopstix.